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Anarchy '05

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The Library of Lists To Do.

I am not liable for naything you do with this information...

101 ways to be a better asshole

  1. Argue with everybody.
  2. Touch the paintings at the museum.
  3. Get hysterical.
  4. Threaten law suits.
  5. Insinuate, implicate and insist.
  6. If you got it, flaunt it.
  7. Eat produce at the grocery store and don't pay for it.
  8. Gamble with the rent money.
  9. Record over a borrowed vcr tape
  10. Tell people that they are in your will, even if they aren't.
  11. Don't get caught.
  12. Stay directly in front or behine fire trucks and ambulances.
  13. When giving out directions, leave out a turn or two.
  14. Don't make up your mind.
  15. Improve your posture by walking with your nose in the air.
  16. Remind people who lose their job that they should work harder.
  17. Talk with your mouth full.
  18. Accuse, confuse and refuse.
  19. Comment on the weight gain of others.
  20. Adjust your nuts (boob) whenever you want.
  21. Keep a pile of wisecracks for tense and serious situations.
  22. Answer a question with a question.
  23. See what it takes for the lifeguard to blow the whistle.
  24. Don't give to charities unless you get something back.
  25. Add the straw that breaks the camels back.
  26. Clean your finger nails at the dinner table.
  27. Tell people what they think they wanna hear.
  28. Notice good ideas and pass them on as your own.
  29. Put a title like Senator or Doctor before your name when making dinner or hotel reservations.
  30. Don't volunteer for the back seat and never take the middle one.
  31. Before exiting the elevator, push all the buttons.
  32. Never do anything until you have been asked twice.
  33. Put off until tomorrow whatever you can do the day after tomorrow.
  34. Spot test "Wet Paint" signs.
  35. Go up on the down escalator and vice versa.
  36. Dont shower after a hard workout.
  37. Lie about your age.
  38. Change channels every two seconds
  39. Develop at least 3 strategies for cutting if front of a
  40. Underline in other peoples books.
  41. Slurp your soup.
  42. If you can't think of something nice, say something nasty.
  43. Be judgmental.
  44. Announce when your going to the bathroom.
  45. Read over peoples shoulders on the bus.
  46. Ignore deadlines.
  47. Revenge is sweet... so get some.
  48. Squeeze the toothpaste from the top, and while your at it, leave the cap off.
  49. Curse the umpire at a Little League game.
  50. When it says "Reserved Parking" that means you.
  51. Take the labels off of unopened cans.
  52. Cover up your mistakes and pass the blame.
  53. Pinch all the chocolate candies until you find the one that you want.
  54. Borrow handkerchiefs to blow your nose.
  55. When your done with your gum, stick it under the chair.
  56. If you do something nice, make sure everyone knows about it.
  57. Bribe little kids... cause they're easy!
  58. Put a rude message on someone elses answering machine.
  59. Measure people by their money and the clothes they wear.
  60. Be ambiguous, it lets you work both sides of the issue.
  61. Leave your underwear in the sink.
  62. Chew other peoples pencils.
  63. Support the death penalty for parking tickets.
  64. Get a backseat drivers license.
  65. Dish it out, but don't take it.
  66. Be a perfectionist in absolutely everything.
  67. Apologize a lot, but don't change.
  68. Change the rules to suit your needs.
  69. Put your cigarette out in planters.
  70. Wear a shirt thats says 'Fuck You' or to that affect.
  71. Pull the covers over to your side.
  72. Eat cookies or crackers in bed.
  73. Let doors slam behind you ? in people's faces.
  74. Repeat yourself.
  75. Repeat yourself.
  76. Tell your kids 'How it was..' back when you were a kid.
  77. Vividly describe a hysterectomy to your date before ordering dinner.
  78. Scribble your signature on important documents.
  79. Use the whole can of starter fluid on the charcoal.
  80. Put things back where they don't belong.
  81. Take a colicky baby to the movies.
  82. Have belching contests in restaurants.
  83. Make the same mistake twice.
  84. Pee in the swimming pool.
  85. Ride on the shoulder un you pass all the jammed traffic, and then cut in.
  86. Wear a large hat to the movies.
  87. Always have an ulterior motive.
  88. Always take the biggest piece.
  89. Forget the pooper scooper when walking your dog.
  90. Take cheap shots.
  91. Take forever to find a word in Scrabble.
  92. Cause gridlock.
  93. Get up on the wrong side of bed.
  94. Change your mind.
  95. Glue a chip on your shoulder.
  96. Put salt in sugar containers.
  97. Blow out other peoples birthday candles.
  98. Don't refill the ice cube tray.
  99. Ask people what they paid for their clothes.
  100. Cut off people in the middle of their sentences.
  101. Practice pulling the wool over people's faces.

20 ways to sabatoge you school

1.PUT A ROTTON APPLE OR STALE SANDWICH IN THE TEACHERS DESK.

2.STEAL THE ATTENDANCE BOOK. ADD IN AND RUB OUT TICKS, AND REPLACE OR JUST BURN IT. SAME GOES FOR UNGUARDED CONDUCT SHEETS OR REPORTS. DON'T MISS YOUR CHANCE.

3.FILL A SYRINGE (MINUS NEEDLE) WITH MIXED EPOXY & ALCOHOL. YOU NOW HAVE 30 MINUTES TO FILL LOCKS, ETC., BEFORE THE GLUE HARDENS. YOU CAN ALSO USE CEMENT, SUPER GLUE OR EVEN BITS OF WOOD, NAILS, ETC.

4.ANOTHER USE OF THE SYRINGE IS TO PRETEND TO SHOOT UP WHEN THE TEACHER IS WATCHING. EXPLAIN THAT THAT YOU HAVE TO DO IT BECAUSE SCHOOL IS SO HORRIBLE

5.PHONE THE SCHOOL AT RANDOM TIMES. TRY FLOOD, FIRE OR BOMB WARNINGS. DISGUISE YOUR VOICE AND HOLD A HANDKERCHIEF OVER YOUR MOUTH.

6.PRETEND TO HAVE FOOD POISONING. (AFTER LUNCH BREAK) GET LOTS OF PEOPLE TO JOIN IN. ROLL ON THE FLOOR, OR GET SICK BY PUSHING YOUR FINGERS DOWN YOUR THROAT. TRY IT IN ASSEMBLY. WITH LUCK YOU CAN START GENERAL PANIC.

7.DRAW OR PAINT SLOGANS ON ROLL DOWN MAPS OR SLIDE SCREENS. OBSCENITIES ARE BEST

8.HAND OUT NOTICES TO NEW PUPILS TELLING THEM WHICH TEACHERS ARE NASTY & WHY.

9.BAD FOOD? HAVE A GOOD OLD FASHIONED FOOD RIOT.

10.ORGANIZE MASSIVE SEARCHES FOR "LOST" CONTACT LENSES IN GYM CLASS OR IN HALLWAYS BETWEEN CLASSES. DON'T LET ANYONE WALK THROUGH THE HALL AS THEY MIGHT STEP ON IT. PRETENDING YOU'VE LOST SOMETHING IS A GOOD COVER FOR ALL KINDS OF SUBVERSIVE BEHAVIOR.

11.IF YOU STILL HAVE TO WEAR UNIFORMS, TRY WEARING THEM BACK TO FRONT IN PROTEST. OR DARE BOYS & GIRLS TO WEAR EACH OTHER'S UNIFORMS. IF THIS DOESN'T WORK, TRY A BLANKET PROTEST.

12.TRY POLITICAL GAMES. SCHOOL IS 12 YEARS BRAINWASHING WITHOUT TRIAL. SLOWDOWNS, WORK TO RULES, STRIKES AND OCCUPATIONS ARE FUN. BUT DON'T LET LEADERS OR EGO TRIPPERS SPEAK FOR YOU.

13.GET EVERYONE TO BRING IN ALL THEIR PETS TO SCHOOL TO SHOW THE TEACHER.

14.WRITE DOWN A LIST OF ALL THE STUPID RUBBISH OR RULES YOU HAVE TO LEARN & HAND IT OUT ON SPORTS DAY OR OPEN DAY.

15.NOW & THEN GET LOADS OF STUDENTS TO RUSH TO THE OFFICE TO GET A RUMOR CONFIRMED OR DENIED.

16.MAKE A CITIZENS ARREST ON YOUR WORST TEACHER. DRAG HIM/HER IN FRONT OF THE CLASS AND PUT HIM/HER ON TRIAL FOR ROTTING THE MINDS OF YOUTH.

17.RIP OFF DISHES AND SILVERWARE FROM THE CAFATERIA, OFFICE EQUIPMENT FROM THE OFFICE, PAINT ETC. FROM THE ART ROOM, LIGHT BULBS FROM THE SOCKETS, TOILET PAPER FROM THE JACKS, ETC.,ETC. DONATE THEM TO YOURSELVES OR LOCAL ANARCHIST GROUP.

18.DURRING LUNCH BREAK TURN ON AND LIGHT ALL GAS TAPS IN THE SCIENCE LAB. MAKE SURE YOUR NOT CAUGHT AT THIS PRANK & TRY A GOOD DISGUISE.

19.GET EVERYONE TO DEMAND TO SEE THEIR SCHOOL RECORDS FILES, EVERYONE ELSE (POLICE, SOCIAL WORKERS, ETC.) IS ALLOWED TO SEE THEM.

20.MAKE A FUSE BY STICKING A CIGARETTE BETWEEN THE TWO ROWS IN A MATCH BOOK. NON-FILTER CIGARETTES ARE GOOD BUT MARLBORO ARE BEST 'CAUSE THEY USE MORE NITRATE TO MAKE 'EM BURN FASTER. TOSS THE FUSE IN A WASTE BIN, OR ANYWHERE WITH LOTS OF BURNABLES. THE OFFICE IS BEST. WAIT 5 MINUTES. CALL ALARM YOURSELF TO AVOID ANY "ACCIDENTS." PRACTICE AT HOME FIRST.


 

20 things to do when bored in class

  1. Make a paper football and get someone to play with you. When they put their hands up into a little goal, flick the football at the teacher and immediatly go back to doing your work.
  2. Out of nowhere, or when it is quiet, say loud enough for the class to hear "When I say heeee-aay, you say hoooo, Heeee-aay" and see how many people say "ho"
  3. At another quiet time, shout out "Marco" and then in a squeeky voice shout out "Polo seinior"
  4. Practice your ty-chi. Wave your arms all around like your really know what you are doing.
  5. Meditate. Humm as loud as you can and when your teacher says something about it, act all offended. "Do you have a problem with my religion, sir!?"
  6. If one of your friends is drinking something, in the middle of a drink start chanting "chug! chug! chug!"
  7. When the class is very quiet, say in a casual voice "Knock knock"
  8. When the class is quiet, sigh and say "This class is really boring"
  9. Shoot rubber bands at someone, when they accuse you look confused and point to the person to the left of you. After that, point to the person on the right of you ect...
  10. If you are black start singing country music, if you are white start rapping.
  11. Make as many paperballs as you can and set them on your desk in a giant pile. If anyone looks at you, look tough and nod at them.
  12. If you are a male, start singing Brittany Spears's "Hit me baby one more time" complete with raise the roof action.
  13. Take everything out of your backpack and stack it on your desk. Take out a sheet of paper and take invintory of your stuff.
  14. Take an empty gum wrapper and put it in your palm, then signal someone by going "pssssst. Hey!" Make them lean all close to you and get them thinking you have something interesting to say. Look around and then give them the gumwrapper.
  15. See how many tiny paper balls you can set on the person in front of you without them knowing it.
  16. Tie someones shoe's together and kick them.
  17. Use a kick me sign. As a challenge, see how many people you can put a kick me sign on without them knowing it.
  18. Start singing "Can you feel the love tonight" from the Lion King.
  19. Fall asleep. When you wake up say shit like "I had a dream and you were in it. And you! You too!...
  20. Blurt out chinese waiter talk. "SHICKEN FRIE RIE, SEVEN DOLLA"


Vampyric and Snaps